Its such a serious thing to make joke with holocaust, cause the Jews might not find it funny, hence we have selected quiet a huge list of holocaust jokes that wont offend anyone but at the same funny enough to make you laugh out loud, here they are.
Funny Holocaust Jokes – Holocaust Jokes One Liners
1. Why did the Auschwitz shower heads have 12 holes? Because Jews have 10 fingers!!
2. Hitler: Tuday, Hitlerr is feeling generrouz. Tuday, Hitlerr is sending half of you home! Jews of the concentration camp: Heeee!!!!!!! (joy and happiness). Hitler: Hans, brring ze chainsaw!
3. What’s the difference between a ton of coal and a thousand Jews? Jews burn longer.
4. Have you heard about the new German microwave? It’s got ten seats inside.
5. Two Jewish children are sitting on top of a roof near a chimney. A passer-by asks, ‘What are you doing there?’ ‘We are waiting for our parents.’
6. What were Jews used for in connection with the 1936 Olympics? For the cindertrack and the Olympic flame.
7. What’s the difference between a Jew and Harry potter? Harry potter came out of the chamber
8. Holocaust jokes aren’t funny anne frankly I’m sick of them!
9. “I was talking to this hot holocaust survivor the other day so I asked her for her number.”
10. What is the difference between a ton of coal and 1,000 Jews? Jews burn longer!
11. Why don’t Jewish cannibals like eating Germans? They give them gas.
12. What does a Jewish American Princess do during a nuclear holocaust? Gets out her sun reflector!
13. What’s the worst thing about being black and Jewish? Having to sit in the back of the oven.
14. What’s a Jews favourite band? Nickelback
15. Auschwitz has the highest hotel rating…1.1 million stars.
16. Why will the Jews never forget the holocaust? Because it sounds like “low cost!”
17. German officer: right guys get up today you will be playing cricket you will be playing in the ASHES
18. Why did Hitler get hit by the baseball? He did Nazi it coming
19. Christians always go on about the time Jesus fed five thousand people with five loaves and two fishes
20. What about Hitler? He made six million Jews toast
21. how do you make a jew fly? with a slight breeze.
22. Where were black Jews first discovered? At the back of the oven
23. Laura: My mom never bought me an easy bake oven when I was a child. Tom: That’s probably a good thing since you’re Jewish!
24. What do Jews say when they are asked to go on a train. they say ‘I’m not falling for that trick again!’
25. Hitler: “This is Hitler to the Concentration camp, what does the weather look like?” Guard: “Hail Hitler.”
26. Q: Whats the difference between a Jew and Santa Claus A: Santa Claus goes down the chimney
27. What do hippies and jews have in common? They both bake at 420
28. Everyone needs to stop making Holocaust jokes! Can you nazi how hurtful they are?
29. What band was formed by French holocaust survivors? Jew Ran Jew Ran
30. My son has blonde hair and blue eyes. Your kids may be cute but at least I know MINE wouldn’t have died in the Holocaust!
31. My mom died of skin cancer, she was a bitch anyways
32. The former Nazi concentration camp of Auschwitz has been re-opened as a tourist attraction and memorial.
33. I wrote to the owners to suggest they call the place ‘Jewgassic Park’, but they never replied.
34. What’s the difference between boy scouts and jews? Boy Scouts come home from camp.
35. What do you call a Jewixh Pokemon trainer? Ash.
36. whats the difference between a jew and a pizza only one comes out of the oven
37. What’s the difference between a jew and a penis? Hitler likes one and doesn’t like the other.
38. What’s the difference between a lobster and a jew?
39. A lobster actually tastes good after being boiled.
40. How do you get a Jewish girls number? You roll up her sleeve
41. Because they served him orange jews.
42. How does one pick up a Muslim? You cant they already blew up their school
43. Why do Jews always smell so bad?They have had bad experiences with showers.
44. What’s a Jews worst nightmare? Being creamated.
45. What did god say the first time he made a black person?
46. Oops. I burnt one.
47. Why are there so many black Jews because they were at the back of the line for the gas chamber
48. What did the Jew dad say when his Jew boy asked him for 40 bucks? What do you need $20 for?
49. How many jews can you fit in a Volkswagen? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and 40 in the ash tray.
50. how do German tie their shoes? in little NAZI’S
Best Holocaust Jokes – Holocaust Jokes List
51. what did the german say to the jew? smoke a biff so i can blaze your ashes
52. Why won’t Jewish girls let German guys cum in their mouths?They say it taste nazi
53. When was the last time the jewish boy saw his father?At the top of the chimney.
54. I wish I was a jew during world war two in europe.. they got a free train ticket!
55. Can you “nazi” that all of these jokes are racist anne frankly i think this is childish
56. What is the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? A Boy Scout can come back from camp
57. I only moved to Germany last week and already I’ve been banned from the local swimming baths. It’s not my fault though.
58. They should put a sign up if they don’t want people wearing gas masks in the communal showers.
59. How was copper wire invented? 2 Jews fighting over a penny
60. What is the difference between a Jew and a steak?A steak is clean when it goes in the oven.
61. How do you pick up a Jewish girl?A broom and a dust pan
62. How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb none cause they got turned to ash by hitler
63. You wouldn’t believe what the nazis did to my grandpa!6 years in the S.S. and he wasn’t even promoted to officer rank!
64. How do you fit 5 nazis and 2 Jews in a car. 2 nazis in the front, 3 in the back and you put the Jews in the ash tray
65. Why did the fat relief teacher fall over? because she did nazi it coming
66. Q: What do you call Hitler today?A: Donald Trump.
67. What’s a Jew’s favorite Call of Duty game mode? One in the Chamber.
68. Have you heard about the new German microwave? It’s got 10 seats inside!
69. What’s the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn’t scream when you throw it in the oven!
70. I don’t know if I can trust my Jewish barber. He doesn’t actually have any hair himself.
71. What do you call it when a jew throws a german in the oven? opposite day
72. Introducing the new jewish shower! Now with chemicals!
73. What’s worse than 1 beesting, 2 beestings, What’s worse than 2 beestings, 3 beestings What’s worse than 3 beestings, the holocaust, What’s worse than the holocaust, 4 beestings
74. A Jewish boy was cleaning an ashtray. Hitler walks by and says, “Are you looking for someone?”
75. Doctor, Doctor give me the news I’ve got a bad case of killing Jews
76. how do you pick up jewish girls? With a dustpan
77. Where does a Jewish boy with AD-HD go?Concentration camp
78. what was the only downside to the holocaust?The banks in Germany dropped by 20 percent!
79. What did Hitler say when he was accused of the Holocaust. “Its just a prank bro”.
80. Why was Hitler so mad at breakfast?
Holocaust Jokes Funny – Jewish Holocaust Jokes
81. Two jews are having a fight while washing, and one of them grabs a block of soap, as if to throw. The other cries:”hey! Don’t involve parents!”
82. What did Hitler get for his birthday? aN easy bake oven and a gi jew
83. Why wasn’t Hitler invited to the barbeque? He always burns the Franks.
84. How do you cook a Jewish person? All jew have to do is call up hitler
85. What do you call a flying Jew?A kike.
86. Your holocaust jokes aren’t funny and they’re making me fuhorous.
87. They should call Jupiter JEWPITER because its a gas planet
88. Why did the man give the Jewish woman lotion? Because her skin was ashy
89. why couldnt anne frank finish her diary?she didnt have enough concentration.
90. Why did the jew Fuck his own leg? Cause he saw arran scott
91. why don’t jews like modern cookware? they are afraid of the oven
92. What’s the difference between a Jew and a pizza? I didn’t make love to a pizza when it came out of the oven
93. What’s the difference between a camper and a Jew? One comes back from camp
94. What happens when a Jew with an erection runs into a wall?
95. What’s the difference between juice and Jews? One goes in and the other goes out
96. Where do Jews go to think? Concentration camp!
97. How do you get a jewish girls number, you check her arm.
98. Why was the Jew all out of breath?Because He was gassed
99. U are idiots u guys are gonna get in trouble and nazi it coming
100. ow do you pick up a nice jewish girl?read the number on her arm and grab a broom and dustpan for later.
101. What do Hitler and Jews have in common? They both died by his command.
102. What is the difference between a jew and a pizza?The jew screams when it is in the oven
103. Q: Why don’t you invite Hitler to a barbecue?A: Because he burns all the Franks
104. How do you see how many Jews live in your neighborhood? Roll a quarter down the street
105. How did the tree burn down? A burning Jewish boy was trying to get in his tree house
106. Hitler was so good at roasting he burned 6 million jews
107. Have jew heard what the isreali defense force is training there army in martail arts? jew jitsu and jewdo
108. What did Hitler give his niece for her birthday?