140+ Funny Clean Jokes

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Laughter is like a medicine to the soul. Are you depressed? then all you need to do is to look out for things or situations that will make you laugh and one of them is listening to jokes, I mean very funny joke. Here, we have taken out time to compile for your pleasure a huge list of funny and clean joke, just go ahead and have a good time laughing.

Funny Corny Jokes – Corny Jokes For Kids

1. Q: What does a nosey pepper do? A: Gets jalapeno business!

2. Q: What do you call a fake noodle? A: An Impasta

3. Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An Investigator

4. Q: What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish? A: Every morning you’ll rise and shine!

5. Q: “What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish?” A: “You can’t tuna fish.”

6. Q: Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she will Let it go.

7. Q: What do you get from a pampered cow? A: Spoiled milk.

8. Q: If Mississippi bought Virginia a New Jersey, what would Delaware? A: Idaho… Alaska!

9. Q: Did you hear about that new broom? A: It’s sweeping the nation!

10. Q: What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? A: An irrelephant.

11. Q: What do lawyers wear to court? A: Lawsuits!

12. Q: What gets wetter the more it dries? A: A towel.

13. Q: Where do crayons go on vacation? A: Color-ado!

14. Q: Why did the belt get arrested? A: He held up a pair of pants.

15. Q: What do you call a fat psychic? A: A four chin teller.

16. Q: What do you call a computer floating in the ocean? A: A Dell Rolling in the Deep.

17. Q: What did Bacon say to Tomato? A: Lettuce get together!

18. Q: What do you call a pile of kittens A: a meowntain

19. Q: What do you call a baby monkey? A: A Chimp off the old block.

20. Q: Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato? A: The lettuce was a “head” and the tomato was trying to “ketchup”!

21. Q: Did you hear about the hungry clock? A: It went back four seconds.

22. Q: What do you call a boy who finally stood up to the bullies? A: An ambulance.

23. Q: What do you call a computer that sings? A: A-Dell

24. Q: Did you hear about the shampoo shortage in Jamaica? A: It’s dread-full.

25. Q: What is it called when a cat wins a dog show? A: A CAT-HAS-TROPHY!

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Really Corny Jokes

26. Q: How do you make a tissue dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

27. Q: What is heavy forward but not backward? A: Ton.

28. Q: What do you call a gangsta snowman? A: Froze-T

29. Q: What did the femur say to the patella? A: I kneed you.

30. Q: What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? A: Kitty Perry

31. Q: Why did the picture go to jail? A: Because it was framed.

32. Q: What do you call a three-footed aardvark? A: a yardvark!

33. Q: What do you get when you cross fish and an elephant? A: Swimming trunks.

34. Q: Where do bees go to the bathroom? A: At the BP station!

35. Q: Who earns a living driving their customers away? A: A taxi driver.

36. Q: What do you call a laughing jar of mayonnaise? A: LMAYO

37. Q: What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? A: a thesaurus.

38. Q: “How do you shoot a killer bee?” A: “With a bee bee gun.”

39. Q: How do you drown a Hipster? A: In the mainstream.

40. Q: What kind of jokes do you make in the shower? A: Clean Jokes!

41. Q: What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? A: “Where’s Popcorn?”

42. Q: What do you call sad coffee?” A: Despresso.

43. Q: How do you make holy water? A: Boil the hell out of it!

44. Q: What happened to the dog that swallowed a firefly? A: It barked with de-light!

45. Q: What stays in the corner and travels all over the world? A: A stamp.

46. Q: What is the tallest building in the world? A: The library! It has the most stories!

47. Q: What’s the first bet that most people make in their lives? A: the alpha bet

48. Q. What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck? A. Milk and quackers!

49. Q: How do you organize a space party? A: You planet!

50. Q: What did the leopard say after eating his owner? A: Man, that hit the “spot.”

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Best Corny Jokes 

51. Q: What do you call a sleeping bull? A: A bulldozer!

52. Q: What do you call a man with no body and just a nose? A: Nobody nose.

53. Q: Why did the computer go to the doctor? A: Because it had a virus!

54. Q: Why are frogs so happy? A: They eat whatever bugs them

55. Q: What is brown and has a head and a tail but no legs? A: A penny.

56. Q: How do you make an Octupus laugh? A: With ten-tickles

57. Q: Why are pirates called pirates? A: Cause they arrrrr.

58. Q: What do you call security guards working outside Samsung shops? A: Guardians of the Galaxy.

59. Q: What do you call having your grandma on speed dial? A: Instagram.

60. Q: Why did the banana go to the Doctor? A: Because it was not peeling well

61. Q: Why is England the wettest country? A: Because the queen has reigned there for years!

62. Q: What belongs to you but others use more? A: Your name

63. Q: Why do fish live in salt water? A: Because pepper makes them sneeze!

64. Q: Why did the man put his money in the freezer? A: He wanted cold hard cash!

65. Q: What has one head, one foot and four legs? A: A Bed

66. Q: What is the difference between a school teacher and a train? A: The teacher says spit your gum out and the train says “chew chew chew”.

67. Q: Why did the birdie go to the hospital? A: To get a tweetment.

68. Q: Why did the cross-eyed teacher lose her job? A: Because she couldn’t control her pupils?

69. Q: What do you call someone who is afraid of Santa? A: A Clausterphobic

70. Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? A: Frostbite.

71. Q: What is the best day to go to the beach? A: Sunday, of course!

72. Q: Which is the building is the largest? A: The library because it has the most stories.

73. Q: What do you call an illegally parked frog? A: Toad.

74. Q: What bow can’t be tied? A: A rainbow!

75. Q: What do you call a laughing motorcycle? A: A Yamahahaha

76. Q: What season is it when you are on a trampoline? A: Spring time.

77. Q: Where did the computer go to dance? A: To a disc-o.

78. Q: What three candies can you find in every school? A: Nerds, DumDums, and smarties.

79. Q: What sound do porcupines make when they kiss? A: Ouch

80. Q: Why was the guy looking for fast food on his friend? A: Because his friend said dinner is on me.

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Corny Love Jokes – Short Corny Jokes – Cute Corny Jokes

81. Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: Never mind, it’s over your head!

82. Q: What do you call a bee that lives in America? A: USB

83. Q: How do you make a tissue dance? A: Put a bogey in it.

84. Q: Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance? A: Because he had no-body to go with.

85. Q: How do crazy people go through the forest? A: They take the psycho path.

86. Q: Did you hear about the angry pancake? A: He just flipped.

87. Q: What do prisoners use to call each other? A: Cell phones.

88. Q: What do you call a cow with a twitch? A: Beef Jerky.

89. Q: Did you ever hear about that movie constipation? A: It never came out.

90. Q: What Do You Call A Bear With No Teeth? A: A Gummy Bear

91. Q: What do you get when you cross Sonic The Hedgehog and Curious George? A: 2 Fast 2 Curious

92. Q: Did you hear about the hairdresser? A: She dyed.

93. Q: What do you call a musician with problems? A: a trebled man.

94. Q: Did you hear about the Italian chef that died? A: He pasta way.

95. Q: What washes up on very small beaches? A: Microwaves!

96. Q: What never asks questions but receives a lot of answers? A: the Telephone.

97. Q: What goes through towns, up & over hills, but doesn’t move? A: The road!

98. Q: Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? A: He was lucky it was a soft drink.

99. Q: Why was there thunder and lightning in the lab? A: The scientists were brainstorming!

100. Q: What did Delaware? A: a New Jersey

101. Q: Why did Tony go out with a prune? A: Because he couldn’t find a date!

102. Q: What did the little mountain say to the big mountain? A: Hi Cliff!

103. Q: Did you hear the one about the geologist? A: He took his wife for granite so she left him

104. Q: What did Winnie The Pooh say to his agent? A: Show me the honey!

105. Q: What did the man say to the wall? A: One more crack like that and I’ll plaster ya!

106. Q: What do you get when you cross a fridge with a radio? A: Cool Music

107. Q: Why couldn’t the pirate play cards? A: Because he was sitting on the deck!

108. Q: What’s the difference between bird flu and swine flu? A: If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

109. Q: Why did the traffic light turn red? A: You would too if you had to change in the middle of the street!

110. Q: What did one elevator say to the other elevator? A: I think I’m coming down with something!

111. Q: What do you call a window that raps? A: 2PANEZ

112. Q: Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? A: Because then it would be a foot!

113. Q: What has four wheels and flies? A: A garbage truck!

114. Q: What starts with a P, ends with an E, and has a million letters in it? A: Post Office!

115. Q: What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A: A waist of time

116. Q: What did the blanket say to the bed? A: Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered!

117. Q: Why should you take a pencil to bed? A: To draw the curtains!

118. Q: What do you call an unpredictable, out of control photographer? A: a loose Canon

119. Q: What do you call a frozen dog? A: A pupsicle.

120. Q: What does the Lone Ranger say when he takes out the garbage? A: To the dump, to the dump, to the dump dump dump.

Corny Knock Knock Jokes

121. Knock Knock. Who’s there? Butch, Jimmy and Joe. Butch, Jimmy, and Joe Who? Butch your arms around me, Jimmy a kiss, and let’s Joe.

122. Knock Knock Who’s there? Opportunity. Don’t be silly – opportunity doesn’t knock twice!

123. Knock knock! Who’s there? Dwayne! Dwayne who? Dwayne the bathtub, I’m drowning.

124. ¬†Knock Knock Who’s there? Tunis! Tunis who? Tunis company, three’s a crowd!

125. Knock Knock Who’s there? Iran! Iran who? Iran over here to tell you this!

126. Knock Knock Who’s there? Daisy Daisy who? Daisy me rollin, they hatin

127. Knock Knock Who’s there? Urine Urine Who? URINEsecure don’t know what for

128. Knock, Knock! Who’s There? Buster! Buster who? Buster Cherry! Is your daughter home?

129. Knock Knock Who’s there? Orange Orange who? Orange you going to answer the door?

130. Knock Knock Who’s there? Old lady Old lady who? Wow I didn’t know you could yodel.

131. Knock Knock Who’s there? Doris! Doris who? Doris locked that’s why I am knocking!

132. Knock Knock. Who’s there? The guy who finished second. The guy who finished second who? Exactly.

133. Knock knock! Who’s there? Yah! Yah who? Naaah, bro, I prefer google.

134. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Dumbbell. Dumbbell who? Dumbbell doesn’t work so I had to knock!

135. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? A Pile-Up A Pile-Up Who? Ewwwwww

136. Knock Knock Who’s there? Alex! Alex who? Alex the questions round here!

137. Knock knock Who’s there Amish Amish Who? Awwww How sweet. I miss you too.

138. Knock knock Who’s there Ach! Ach who? Sounds like your coming down with a cold

139. Knock knock Who’s there Woo! Woo who? Don’t get too excited it’s just a knock knock joke.

140. Knock knock Who’s there Moustache! Moustache who? I moustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later.

141. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Doctor Doctor who? That’s a great T.V. show, isn’t it?

142. Knock Knock Who’s there ? Dishes! Dishes who? Dishes the Police come out with your hands up.

143. Knock knock Who’s there Gorilla Gorilla who Gorilla me a hamburger

144. Knock, Knock! Who’s There? Dewey! Dewey who? Dewey have to use a condom?

145. Knock Knock Who’s There? Ahmed Ahmed who? Ahmed the payphone trying to call home. All of my change I spent on you.

146. Knock Knock Who’s There? Ben Hur Ben Hur who? Ben Hur over and give it to her doggy style!

147. Knock Knock Who’s There? Justin Justin who? Your justin time to wipe my @$$ !

148. Knock Knock Who’s there ! Ice cream ! Ice cream who ? Ice cream if you don’t let me in!

Quotes | Questions | Messages | Sayings | Jokes

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