Here is a huge collection of some of the best physics joke ever. I bet you have never seen anything like this before, it will surely make you laugh out loud.

Quantum Physics Jokes – Physics Jokes One Liners

Q: What did the male magnet say to the female magnet? A: From your backside, I thought you were repulsive. However, after seeing you from the front, I find you rather attractive.

2. Q: What do physicists enjoy doing the most at sporting events? A: The Wave

3. Q: Why can’t you trust an atom? A: They make up everything

4. Q: Why are quantum physicists bad lovers? A: Because when they find the position, they can’t find the momentum, and when they have the momentum, they can’t find the position.

5. Q: What did the physicist snack on during lunch? A: A ‘gram’ cracker.

6. Q: Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak? A: Because it’s in the ground state.

7. Q: How many theoretical physicists specializing in general relativity does it take to change a light bulb? A: Two. One to hold the bulb and one to rotate the universe.

8. Q: What do you get when you mix sulfur, tungsten, and silver? A: SWAG

9. Q: What is the name of the first electricity detective? A: Sherlock Ohms

10. Q: Where does bad light end up? A: In a prism.

11. Q: According to a physicist, why is the world so diverse? A: Because it’s made up of alkynes of people.

12. Q: How ugly is your mom? A: Even Fluorine won’t bind to her!

13. Q: What did Donald Duck say in his graduate physics class? A: Quark, quark, quark!

14. Q: What did one uranium-238 nucleus say to the other? A: “Gotta split!”

15. Q: What did one quantum physicist say when he wanted to fight another quantum physicist? A: Let me atom.

16. Q: What do physicists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms? A: A ferrous wheel.

17. Q: Why did Carbon marry Hydrogen? A: They bonded well from the minute they met.

18. Q: What is the simplest way to observe the optical Doppler effect? A: Go out at and look at cars. The lights of the ones approaching you are white, while the lights of the ones moving away from you are red.

19. Q: What animal is made up of calcium, nickel and neon? A: A CaNiNe

20. Q: Why couldn’t the moebius strip enroll at the school? A: They required an orientation.

21. Q: What would you call a clown in jail? A: Silicon (Silly Con)

22. Q: What does a mathematician do about constipation? A: He works it out with a pencil.

23. Q: Why is a physics book always unhappy? A: Because it always has lots of problems.

24. Q: How do you call a one-sided nudie bar? A: A Mobius strip club.

25. Q: What is non-orientable and lives in the ocean? A: Mobius Dick.

26. Q: What is a proof? A: One-half percent of alcohol.

27. Q: If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? A: H2O cubed.

28. Q: Why did the chicken cross the Moebius strip? A: To get to the same side. One day a child was crying very much, then a police asked “what’s the matter? Then the child told something that has weight and volume and occupies space.

29. Q: What did Al Gore play on his guitar? A: An Algorithm

30. Q: How would you skin Schroedinger’s cat? A: Using an inverse furry transform.

31. Q: Why was the Calculus teacher bad at baseball? A: He was better at fitting curves than hitting them.

32. Q: What’s the integral of (1/cabin)d(cabin)? A: A natural log cabin!

33. Q: Why are quantum physicists bad lovers?
A: Because when they find the position, they can’t find the momentum, and when they have the momentum, they can’t find the position.

34. Q: What did the physicist snack on during lunch?
A: A ‘gram’ cracker.

35. Q: Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak?
A: Because it’s in the ground state

36. Q: Why is a physics book always unhappy?
A: Because it always has lots of problems

37. Q: What did Donald Duck say in his graduate physics class?
A: Quark, quark, quark!

38. Q: What did one quantum physicist say when he wanted to fight another quantum physicist?
A: Let me atom

39. Q: Where does bad light end up?
A: In a prism

40. Q: What did the male magnet say to the female magnet?
A: From your backside, I thought you were repulsive. However, after seeing you from the front, I find you rather attractive.

Trivia science questions and answers2

Physical Therapy Jokes – Physical Therapist Jokes – Funny Physical Therapy Jokes

41. Q: What do physicists enjoy doing the most at sporting events?
A: The Wave

42. Q: What is the name of the first electricity detective?
A: Sherlock Ohms

43. Q: How do you call a one-sided nudie bar?
A: A Mobius strip club

44. Q: What did the Nuclear Physicist have for lunch?
A: Fission Chips.

45. Q: What do you get when you cross a chicken and a rock climber?
A: You can’t – a rock climber is a scalar!

46. Q: How many theoretical physicists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two… One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the universe.

47. Q: Two cats are on a roof. Which one slides off first?
A: The one with the smaller mew!

48. Q: Why can’t you trust an atom?
A: They make up everything

49. Q: What was the name of the first satellite to orbit the Earth?
A: The moon

50. Q: What is the name of the first electricity detective?
A: Sherlock Ohms

51. Q: What did one uranium-238 nucleus say to the other?
A: “Gotta split!”

52. Q: What is the simplest way to observe the optical Doppler effect?
A: Go out at and look at cars. The lights of the ones approaching you are white, while the lights of the ones moving away from you are red.

53. Q: Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip?
A: To get to the same side!

54. Q: Two cats are on a roof. Which one slides off first?
A: The one with the smaller mew!

55. Q: How many physicists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Eleven. One to do it and ten to co-author the paper.

56. Q: What’s the difference between an auto mechanic and a quantum mechanic?
A: The quantum mechanic can get the car inside the garage without opening the door.

57. Q: What is an astronomical unit?
A: One hell of a big apartment!

58. Q: What happens when electrons lose their energy?
A: They get Bohr’ed.

59. Q: Does light have mass?
A: Of course not. It’s not even Catholic!!!

60. Q: When was Heisenberg born?
A: Oh, that’s very uncertain.

61. Q: When one physicist asks another, “What’s new?” what’s the typical response?
A: C over lambda.

62. Q: What did the Higgs Boson say when it was prevented from entering the church?
A: “How can you have mass without me?”

63. Q: Why is electricity so dangerous?
A: Because it doesn’t know how to conduct itself properly.

64. Did you hear oxygen and magnesium got together? OMg!

65. According to Einstein’s Theory of Relatives, the probability of in-laws visiting you is directly proportional to how much you feel like being left alone.

66. There is a sign in Munich that says, “Heisenberg might have slept here.”

67. Newtons 5th Law: “performance of the boys in the exams decreases when the number of girls in the exam hall increases”

68. Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.

69. A neutron walked into a bar and asked, “How much for a drink?” The bartender replied, “For you, no charge.”

70. A lesbian in physics class was asked to define the term “vacuum” in class, she answered, “A vacuum is an empty region of space where the Pope lives.”

71. Stephen Hawking’s theory suggests that physical information could permanently disappear in a black hole, this proves the old saying once you go black you never go back.

72. Anger is neither created nor conserved but only changed from one form to another.

 

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