The world might be a much better place if everyone was a hopeless romantic. Why? Because hopeless romantics generally have romantic notions about life. They can’t help themselves but be positive by dreaming and fantasizing about everything being perfect. They particularly love the idea of being in love and are usually people with an elaborate, imagined fantasy of what love and life should be.
Helpless romantics believe that the ultimate answer to everything, and the meaning of life as we know it, is love. As a result, they choose to love beyond all reason and without explanation. They make no apology for doing so despite everything and everyone around them trying very hard to burst their bubble.
Rational thinkers have gone ahead to describe such people as fools while others flatly see them as being dreamers and idealists due to their tendencies to attribute fairy-tale qualities to life and love. They are also further often described as always having their heads in the clouds due to their unending belief in the power of love.
All The Ways To Identify A Hopeless Romantic
Even though many people are not so keen on love these days, as everything has become transactional and superficial, life would never be the same for you if you fall in love with a romantic. There are so many tell-tale signs that one might be a helpless romantic. Other than their outlook on life, their behavior and attitude to certain things are a dead giveaway that they are die-hard romantics and eternal optimists. Below is a list of all the signs that you can use to identify a helpless romantic or tell if you might be one yourself.
1. Actions Do Not Need Validation: Whether you are in search of love or not, you have certain beliefs that you know are strong and important to you. These beliefs that you have crafted and adopted as your own guide your actions and behavior that do not need to be validated by anyone around you.
2. Always Know What Others Want: Hopeless romantics always seem to know what their significant other wants. They are also very good at identifying the true intentions of people, at times even better than they know themselves. They pay attention to the things they like and can anticipate the needs of those around them, sometimes even before those people know that they need something themselves.
3. Love Watching Rom-Coms and Can Cry at the Movies: They enjoy watching romantic comedies, whether it is a critically acclaimed one or a cheesy flick with no cinematic value. They also do not mind shedding a few tears, whether it is for a movie like Titanic or a Super Bowl commercial on YouTube.
4. Love Receiving Gifts like Flowers: Randomly receiving flowers is one of the best things to happen to them. The idea of receiving flowers gets them almost as excited as the prospect of winning the lottery.
5. Always Cooing: Hopeless romantics usually can’t help themselves but to coo “Awwww” audibly at the strangest things. It does not matter where they might be or if they have people around them watching their every move.
6. Celebrates Everything: It does not even matter if it is a milestone event or just a small special moment in their life that could be as simple as a romantic night out, hopeless romantics take time to celebrate all things related to love and are not embarrassed by sharing these special moments with the world. It is one of the things they love about themselves because while everyone cowers away from saying how they feel, they put it out there for everyone to see.
7. Daydream About Relationships: Even if they are not currently in a relationship, hopeless romantics love to imagine what life would be like when they eventually find their one true love. It does not matter that the odds of them finding this person may not be in their favor or that people around them may think that they are stupid, they believe that it is only a matter of time before the person of their dreams walks into their life and so are very happy to wait.
8. Ascribe Feelings to Inanimate Objects: In addition to their soft approach to things in the world, hopeless romantics always tend to ascribe personalities and feelings to inanimate objects.
9. Enjoy Seeing Anything That Promotes Love: If you know someone or you yourself enjoy seeing lovey-dovey stuff, there is a high chance that you or the person might be a hopeless romantic. This lovey-dovey stuff might be anything from videos of a surprise public proposal to pictures on Facebook of little boys and girls dressed up in fancy clothes at a wedding.
10. Love to Participate in Things That Promote Love: When you find that they are very excited to hear that a couple is getting married. They might even go-ahead to offer their services to plan a wedding without being asked to do so just so that they can participate in the whole affair.
11. Sad To Hear About Breakups: News of the breakup or divorce of their favorite celebrity can get them irrationally sad. They might even go as far as shedding a tear when a story from the past resurfaces, like that of Prince Charles and Princess Diana.
12. Become a Random Caregiver: Romantics tend to randomly give care to any and everything that comes around them, including strangers and non-human beings like stray cats and birds.
13. Would Not Do Anything To Ruin a First/Blind Date: In a bid to try to live out all that they have imagined life to be with that person when they eventually get married, or at least not to scare them aware at their first meeting, hopeless romantics are not quite able to identify the true intentions of a person as they have already fallen heads over heels for them. They might be able to fight off the urge to propose to them right there and then but will not be able to ask questions that will point out compatibility issues.
14. Poor Judge of Character: Because they tend to project their romantic ideals on every relationship or potential partner, hopeless romantics are poor judges of character. It does not matter whether they are the one in question or it is someone that they care about that is in a bad relationship as they are always convinced that love will heal everything. They’ll adjust their “rose-tinted glasses” and see what they want to see.
15. Gets Bored After The Honeymoon Stage of a Relationship: The honeymoon stage of a relationship is usually where hopeless romantics thrive the most. However, when this stage passes, they are not always able to put in the work (proper communication, compromise, etc) that allows for the continuous growth of the relationship.
Is Being a Hopeless Romantic a Good or Bad Thing?
There is both a good and a bad side to being a hopeless romantic. Take it like every other thing that you do in life; you must be able to find a balance. There is nothing wrong with being someone who loves the idea of being in love and tends to think of love as having fairy-tale qualities. If you fall into this category, you most likely allow yourself to be vulnerable and take the appropriate risks that let your relationship flourish.
However, when you give high priority to love and the romance that comes with it, your sense of self tends to shrink. This magnifies itself when you are not being loved by your love interest. You idolize this person not necessarily because of the love that exists but because of the idea and feeling of love that should be present. You inadvertently put your life into the person’s hands, ignoring all the warning signs and throwing yourself into not well-thought-out scenarios in order to experience that love. This is what differentiates a hopeless romantic from a hopeful romantic.
How Exactly Do Hopeless Romantics Differ From Hopeful Romantics?
As you can be able to tell from their names, or as explained slightly above, there are some differences between being helplessly romantic and hopefully romantic. Both types of people like to love, but unlike hopeless romantics who have high and unrealistic expectations of love, hopeful romantics have practical expectations. They are passionate about romance but are still pragmatic.
Hopeful romantics tend to be a tad bit more realistic than their counterparts as they do not just idealize or fantasize about love but actively pursue it. They believe in love and are optimistic about the idea of falling for someone but do not leave it all to fate. They also understand that things may not always go as they planned. Below are some of the other ways through which a hopeful romantic may differ from a hopeless one.
1. They Love Rom-Coms Like Hopeless Romantics But Are Not Fooled By Them: While a hopeless romantic can cry after watching a rom-com, not caring if it is cheesy or critically acclaimed, a hopeful romantic is usually objective enough to point out that the plot is ridiculous. This would not stop them from enjoying the movie, however, they do not look to recreate such outrageous fantasies in their lives as hopeless romantics would die to do.
2. They Are Able To Ask The Tough Questions on a First Date: While they hope that everything pans out as they hope, they are not oblivious to the fact that the person they are out with may not be the right match for them. Due to this, they are able to ask intrusive questions that will reveal red flags and whether or not they might be compatible, such as what they do for a living or their opinions on gender roles and racism.
3. Decent Judge of Characters: Unlike their counterparts who always seem to have their heads in the cloud, hopeful romantics do not allow their want for love to let them get wrapped up in a relationship that is heading nowhere. They are able to identify if a relationship is going somewhere or not and can be able to call it quits in order to move on to the next relationship.
4. Able To Find Happiness Within Themselves: Hopeful romantics have no problem with bingeing on a show on Netflix by themselves instead of being in the company of someone who doesn’t deserve them. They value themselves and therefore do not settle for less than what they perceive is real love. They will also never put their relationship before their own dignity, meaning that they are not afraid to leave a relationship where they do not feel loved, safe, and secure.
5. Enjoy Seeing Real Life Love Stories: Both hopeful and hopeless romantics have this trait in common. They love to see successful love stories that melt the heart which then gives them hope that they might one day find their very own special person.
6. They Understand The Imperfection of Real Love and People: This is the main thing that differentiates people who are hopeful romantics from those that are hopeless. When you totally understand that there is no perfect specimen, you are able to tailor what you want to what is available. This stops you from having unrealistic expectations.
7. Looks Forward to The Relationship Evolving Past the Honeymoon Stage: Unlike their counterparts, hopeful romantics tend to look forward to learning more about their partner and growing a closer bond with them. This makes them more suitable to evolving past the honeymoon stage of a relationship. The spark fading in a relationship does not scare them.
Being involved in a whirlwind romance (either with someone who is or as a hopeless romantic), is one of the top things a human being can experience in life. If you have ever fantasized about what it would be like to live in a romantic fairy tale, you are definitely not the only person who has felt this way and it is perfectly normal to find this idea appealing. Many never get to feel this type of love in their lifetime, which is why those that do tend to boast about it. We see this every other day on Facebook with people who do not miss to tell the world they are in love.
The goal of it all should, however, be that this love coexists with some level of realism. You should be able to build a healthy, strong relationship where both partners can live happily forever with lasting intimacy instead of one that fizzles out after the flames of excitement have died off.