A female-led relationship (FLR) is a type of romantic or intimate relationship in which the woman takes the lead role, while the man willingly submits and defers to her authority. In an FLR, the woman is typically the dominant partner and may make the majority of the decisions, including financial decisions or decisions related to household management. An FLR requires open communication, mutual respect, and consent, and is not a form of abuse or coercion. It is up to the individuals involved in the relationship to decide what works best for them, and FLRs can come in many different shapes and forms.
In various parts of the world, most of their culture permit relationships that men always take the lead. However, this is not so in the world of today because some men now crave female-led relationships. Such a deviation prescribed by gender stereotypes has led to the existence of so many female-led relationships. Although it might be somewhat hard to give a particular definition to this kind of relationship and may sound new or strange to some people, the reality here is that it does exist.
This type of relationship has been tipped to be a game-changer because it centers on the flip side of a normal relationship. In such a relationship, the woman usually takes the dominant position, making all the important decisions while the man plays along. Interestingly, female-led relationships are now pushing what society perceived as the norm in the opposite direction. The best word to describe it is “unconventional,” as such a relationship empowers the female to take charge where male dominance once prevailed.
It is pertinent to note that female-led relationships are different from the current trend of ensuring men and women have equal rights in a relationship. Female-led relationships give women the absolute authority to make choices and important decisions which would have been done on a 50:50 basis. While some men would still choose the former, others desire to be in female-led relationships, thus giving rise to female-led marriages.
Female-Led Relationships Come in Different Levels
While the traditional male-led relationships often give men absolute power and authority, female-led relationships can be a little bit more complex as it comes in four different levels. Depending on you and your partner’s decision, you can choose the level that works best for you. For those who desire to be in a female-led relationship, these categories discussed below will help you decide on what you actually want.
1. Lower Level Female-Led Relationships
This level of relationship is considered the most lenient female-led relationship. Here, the woman doesn’t have the absolute authority to make important decisions in the relationship. Nevertheless, the man seeks the woman’s input on important issues but doesn’t guarantee that she is the leader. More so, the woman can also make important decisions, but only with the man’s consent.
2. Moderate Level Female-Led Relationships
In this type of relationship, the woman’s authority is more obvious, and she is directly involved in the day-to-day running of the relationship. However, she has the authority to set boundaries regarding how far she exercises that authority and may choose when not to exercise it over her partner. That notwithstanding, knowing that she has that authority will inspire more confidence and a sense of belonging, which would give room for more equality and balance in the relationship.
3. Higher Level Female-Led Relationships
In a higher level female-led relationship, the woman has absolute power and takes on the man’s role. She sets boundaries for what she wants and what she doesn’t want to happen in the relationship. This type of relationship can pass for the opposite of traditional relationships. For instance, the woman becomes the breadwinner and head of the household. In most cases, it will extend to their love life. If the man feels comfortable having her in such a role, the couple would undoubtedly enjoy a fruitful relationship.
4. Extreme/Supreme Level Female-Led Relationships
In this female-led relationship, the woman has the ultimate power and control over the man in the relationship. She takes the lead in all aspects of their relationship, including running the household, family, financial aspects, and even her partner’s life. It is largely considered unhealthy because the man has little or no ground in the relationship. Rather, he plays the more submissive role to his partner.
What You Must Bear in Mind Before Starting a Female-Led Relationship
To enjoy healthy and sustainable female-led relationships, there certain things you need to bear in mind. These things may serve as rules to help you properly define the relationship with your partner.
- Most of the financial decisions are made by the woman. The man only agrees with her and respects whatever decision she has taken.
- When making household decisions, the woman makes the majority, if not all, of them. However, the man can be allowed to bring suggestions, which is subject to consideration by the woman.
- When it comes to social gatherings, the woman handles their social calendar and gives priority to which social gatherings and events to attend
- With her authority, the woman can choose to guide or inspire the man to improve himself or stop bad habits like smoking, excessive drinking, and much more.
- The household chores are also divided between the man and the woman. In most cases, the man may be doing chores like cooking and cleaning while the woman takes care of other manly chores.
Why Do Men Seek Female-Led Relationships?
Being in female-led relationships has its turns and twists. While for some, it will be absurd for a man to relinquish his position and hand over the power or authority to the woman, to others, it will seem quite easy. Nevertheless, it has some benefits, which explains why some men do it willingly. Some of these reasons are outlined below:
- Knowing that the woman is completely in charge, the man enjoys the relationship without thinking of responsibilities and consequences. Thus, it comes with little or no hassle in terms of decision-making.
- Being in a female-led relationship is more preferable for men who are naturally more inclined to take traditional female roles such as cooking, house cleaning, taking care of the kids, and have no interest in being the main authority figure and breadwinner in the house.
- Some who have always had important decisions taken by their mom or sisters will feel more comfortable passing the baton to their partner while they sit back and focus on their career and other endeavours.
- When a female is in the dominant position, some men will enjoy that because of shared responsibility. Knowing that the burden of making difficult decisions alone has been lifted off their shoulders. This will also promote sustainable partnership between them.
- It gives room for a man to know their partner’s worth and become highly valued and appreciated. More than that, it will help create and an ambience of a peaceful home with no power tussle.
Why Women Seek a Female-Led Relationship
Women would want female-led relationships for many reasons. Although many believe that women desire it majorly because of the unjust and ill-treatment they have endured in the male-dominated world. However, that’s not all; see more reasons below:
- Some of these women can now push for equality or create the change they desire by being the head of the household or relationships without getting approval from the man.
- They have control over virtually everything, from their finances to household chores and kitchen management. They also get to make decisions about parenting and other aspects of the family.
- With a woman as the head, she will have the opportunity to mold their men into whatever they want them to be. For instance, most men always enjoy motivation and guidance from their partners, helping the woman to create an ideal man, making sure they meet her expectations.
- When women are in the top position, there will be little or no tension and power issues in the relationship. That way, women will feel more respected, understood, cared for, and loved by their partner, which helps to improve intimacy.
- A man whose woman is in charge has fewer worries because most of the things that he would have to worry about will be taken care of by the woman—for instance, catering for the household both materially and otherwise.
Female-Led Relationships Also Come With Some Demerits
While there are enormous benefits to being in a female-led relationship, there are also other flipsides. Whether you are in a male-led or female-led relationship, both come with some challenges which can either make or mar your relationship. For instance, the extreme female-led relationship may not be a go for many people, while others would like to try the higher, moderate, and lower levels. Whatever be the case, try to understand some of the limiting factors in female-led relationships below.
- There are several negative feelings and stigma attached to this kind of relationship because society already has traditional views affecting your relationship.
- A man in the submissive position might lose interest in their partner and ways of doing things when unsatisfied with their decisions and may not have the guts to tell them.
- The female in the dominant position might make hasty decisions, which may override their partner’s interest, like in a man-led relationship.
How One Can Create a Balance in a Female-Led Relationship?
In whatever kind of relationship you find yourself, be it a male-dominated, female-dominated, or equal relationship, there is no denying that balance is very vital. For female-led relationships, some women might choose this type of relationship to balance their lives, while others would prefer the traditional male-led relationships. But how can one really create a healthy balance in such a relationship?
- A partnership should be promoted between the man and the woman, such that both should play an active part in making important decisions. With this, there won’t be a serious difficulty, and no stones will be left unturned when making big decisions.
- The parties involved should respect each other, and such deserving respect should always be reciprocated. When there is an equal amount of respect from both sides, it will help sustain the relationship.
- For being the leader, the woman should encourage freedom of expression and openness from their partners. Hence, she should always strive to understand how her man feels at all times, and when things are going awry, you shouldn’t hesitate to talk about it.
- When you feel like you have lost the balance or even the spark in your relationship and everything you try didn’t work out, try seeking professional advice or perhaps take a little break, and after a while, you can continue. This will help you get the balance you need in your relationship.
- Understanding your partner’s true nature is also essential as it will help balance the energy and make everyone happy. Sometimes, when a woman takes the lead in an unforeseen and grudging way, this will give rise to many things, including constant arguments, low libido, and much more.
- Despite being in such a submissive position and having your woman as the lead, the man shouldn’t hesitate to step up and give her a hand when he sees her hands are full. This will not only earn you more respect and love but will increase between you two and push your relationship to the next level.
Other Important Tips To Bear In Mind
Love Unconditionally: The primary reason why couples come together is because of the love they have for each other. When it comes to female-led relationships, it’s about roles and empowerment, but there shouldn’t be a time when love is lost, as this can lead to the end of the relationships. The couple should continue to value each other for sustainability.
Transparency: Although you are the female lead, try as much as possible to make your partner be himself. When people are free and open, they can unleash their greatest potentials through the relationship as it will tend to bring out the best in you always.
Communication: The most important factor in any relationship is communication. The couple must learn to talk about their relationship and also understand each other when they talk. When you communicate frequently, you and your partner will always tell each other what you want. This will ensure the relationship stays afloat and a problem detected before they escalate.
Respect: Ego and pride are two things that crash relationships more easily. It starts small until when the two parties are drifted apart. You must learn to understand and respect each person’s role, and even when there is something to talk about, try to do it with respect. Respect your partner’s opinion no matter how relevant or irrelevant it is. When this is done right, there won’t be room for abuses and other issues.
Don’t Let Others Define Your Relationship: People differ, and so are their opinions. When building your relationship based on people’s opinions, there will be severe issues. Therefore, don’t allow other people’s views to define your relationship because you are in it together with your partner. In the end, it is only you, and your partner’s opinion is what matters.
